I didn't forget. Even if that function never existed, I'll still remember it. I won't forget it. It's not easy to forget something that is special to you. I can forget everyone else's, but I definitely won't forget yours.




Seriously, it's not easy for me to remember something vividly and get reminded automatically whenever these dates come along. It's really hard. It's kept in my heart all the time. If I remember something about you very clearly, you are very important to me.




I know I did it at the wrong timing. I'm sick of waiting. It's been far too long.





I didn't forget, just appear.

I went back to ngee ann today. I was supposed to go back for an alumni CO practice. It's pretty cool how I can force myself to wake up in the morning to go for this, when I'm always late for study dates at the library. Haha.




Before I step into the cd shelter, I smelt something so familiar. It was the smell of the place we always practised at. It immediately triggered those past memories. I like this feeling.




I like it.




I just wanna say that if I like your smell, I won't want to forget you.





In short, I want you to be with me all the while.




I was asked an intriguing question today. I have the answer.





I like the way you react to me.

It's been really long since I posted any blogposts. Hah.




I think it's time for me to start prioritising my time now. I'm starting to get the jitters from all the pressure placed on me. It's an invisible force, pushing you to your limits. At first, it simply irritates you, but after some time, it seems to be all fine and acceptable. It's something that you can never go against. I suppose we can only learn to live with it.




I define my life into two main parts, studying and playing. And I was playing today. The whole day. I've been playing too much. I need someone to anchor me down, but constant studying just isn't my style. I only come to realise that I'm such a playful person.




There is a need to settle down. I seem to have come to terms with it, but I'm still playing my time away. Anyway, I suppose playing after OP ain't a bad idea? :D




Putting aside the idea of me playing, my anger level was high today. I think I'm under some pressure and stress. The scary thing is that I can't sense it. That's intimidating.





I think I'm just angry with myself. Of course, it was exacerbated by external factors. It's alright, I'm feeling happy again now.





Stop playing so much.

I don't like it when my mindset changes everyday. In the end, despite the new mindset made the previous day, I still revert back to the old one. Sigh. Subsequently, it goes back and forth. Swinging from place to place. But it always swings back to the old mindset.




Not that I don't like the old mindset, perhaps the new mindset is new and appealing for now. But whenever the new mindset gives me troubles, I'll immediately revert back to the old one.





Till now, I still resist changes.





This uncertainty gets on my nerves.

Okay, I'm bored. Although it's late, but I don't want to sleep yet.





Recently, I've been thinking about it. It ravages my mind, occupies my heart, takes my attention and concentration away. It fills my mind completely. I can no longer it, though I refuse to take it away either. I find it amazing. How it can change just like this, but return back the next moment. It simply amazes me.





It's not as if this had never happened to me before. Come to think of it, I prefer confusion. I prefer it to be all blurred and unsure. It gives me room to think. Perhaps, I just enjoy observing reactions of others towards relationships. It's interesting to see how one's reaction can influence that of another's.





Those memories never fail to bring a foolish smile on my face. Given my poor memory, I hope I won't forget anything. Honestly, I cherish all my relationships. Actually, my memory isn't bad, it's selective. Frankly, I only remember things that I like. Hah.






The things I like are very limited. Don't be too sad if I always forget stuff about you. I care and love everyone. Come closer to me and you will know it.





Glad you know it. Never do stupid things again then.

It all seems weird when your ideas or thoughts start contradicting each other. It feels as if they don't carry any weight. It kind of undermines self-confidence, when you can't even figure out exactly what you wish to achieve. That's what I concluded.





I don't know what went wrong with me, but I actually like to let myself be depressed. Take note, I'm not depressed. :D I like the feeling of letting my emotions swing across the spectrum from depression to euphoria within that split moment. Actually, I can say that I purposely made myself feel depressed, to contrast and bring out the difference of being happy.






Honestly, I really do make myself depressed. I realised that there's only one reason I would make myself depressed over. Only that. Wallowing in the depths of depression aint at all bad. Like I would say, as long as I like it.






I like to experience lots of emotions, especially when I have a strong feeling for it. A very strong and powerful feeling.





Undoubtedly, I am very happy. I find it hard not to smile heartily for a day. Seriously, I find it hard to not smile or laugh, or even smirk. Haha.





I never told a single someone, everything about me before. Trust me, I have much to hide.

I was trying to cut my fringe in the toilet just now. Apparently, it's no easy job, when the scissors my mom gave me was so small. It can barely cut an inch each time. And I realise it's not funny when small stubs of hair make their way into my eyes. Haha.



I succeeded in getting my fringe nicely trimmed. Short enough to not obstruct my vision. But I have this feeling that I'm going to do the same thing again in due time.




Anyway, I just realised my hair is really long. looooooooooooooooooooooong. :D




Hairy~